Sextortion: blackmail by phone or WhatsApp and what to do

Sextortion: blackmail by phone or WhatsApp and what to do

The message arrives on WhatsApp, by SMS or in a call: someone claims to have intimate photos or videos of you and threatens to send them to your family, your work or your contacts unless you pay. The panic is immediate, and that is exactly what they are counting on. This is called sextortion, it is a crime, and there is a clear way to deal with it. The first thing to know: paying almost never makes it stop, and not paying almost never ends with the material being shared.

How does sextortion work?

There are two kinds, and it helps to tell them apart because the fear they cause is different:

• Mass, random sextortion. The same message goes to thousands of numbers at once, often with an old password of yours (taken from a data breach) to sound believable: "I know your password, I have access to your camera, I recorded what you were doing." In the vast majority of cases they have nothing: it is an automated bluff that works because, out of thousands of messages, someone gets scared and pays.
• Targeted sextortion. It starts with real contact: someone messages you on social media or a dating app, earns your trust, you exchange intimate content (or they record you on a video call without you knowing), and then the blackmail starts. Here there may be real material, and the blackmailer often sends screenshots of your contact list to increase the pressure.

In both cases the script is the same: urgency ("you have 24 hours"), secrecy ("don't tell anyone, it will make things worse") and a payment that is hard to trace (an instant transfer, an e-wallet or cash-send voucher, cryptocurrency or gift cards). Each of those three is a red flag.

Why shouldn't I pay?

For three reasons that are proven again and again:

1. Paying does not buy silence, it buys a second demand. Paying proves two things to the blackmailer: that fear works on you and that you have money. The next demand usually arrives within days.
2. The material, if it exists, has already been copied. Nothing you pay guarantees that it will be deleted. There is no real "deal" with an anonymous criminal.
3. Giving in makes you a permanent target. Your details (your number, your profile, the fact that you pay) are sold and reused in other campaigns.

And contrary to what fear tells you: in mass cases there is nothing to share, and in targeted cases the material is shared far less often than they threaten, because sharing earns them no money and exposes them instead. The blackmailer's business is your fear, not your shame.

What do I do, step by step?

1. Do not pay anything. Not a single rand, not even "to buy time". Stop negotiating: do not discuss the amount or ask for more proof.
2. Do not delete anything yet. Take screenshots of the messages, numbers, profiles, threats and any payment details they gave you. They are evidence. Back everything up.
3. Cut contact without warning. Block the number and the profile. Do not announce that you are going to the police: a case is opened, not negotiated.
4. Lock down your accounts. Change your passwords (start with your email), switch on two-step verification everywhere and review your social media privacy: friends list hidden, profile private, strangers removed from your contacts.
5. Tell the people close to you, however hard it is. A short message to family or a partner ("someone is trying to blackmail me with fake material, ignore anything you receive") takes away their most powerful weapon: surprise.
6. Open a case. Go to your nearest police station (SAPS) with all your screenshots, open a case and ask for the case number. Extortion is a crime, and online crimes are reported at a police station like any other case. If you are under 18, or the case involves a child, say so clearly from the start.
7. Report the number in the spam numbers directory so that others recognise the campaign.

If the blackmail followed a supposed romance in which the other person also asked you for money with some other excuse, it may overlap with the fake-relative scam; the approach is the same: cut contact, check through an independent channel and report it.

What if I already paid?

Do not blame yourself: you acted under threat. But change your approach now:

• Do not pay any more, even if they promise it is "the last time". It is not.
• Keep the payment receipts: they leave a trail that helps the investigation.
• Open a case anyway, and explain that payments were already made. Having paid does not make you any less of a victim or weaken your case.
• If you paid by card, transfer or e-wallet, call your bank's fraud line at once (the number on the back of your card): sometimes a payment can still be stopped. You will find more about getting money back on our blog.

Frequently asked questions

They say they have a video of me, but I have never been on a video call with a stranger. Could it be true? Almost certainly not. It is the mass bluff: they send the same message to thousands of numbers, hoping that someone has something to fear. If there is no possible source for that material, it does not exist.

What if the material is real? The steps do not change: do not pay, keep evidence, block, warn the people close to you and open a case. Shame is their tool; every person you have warned is one tool fewer. If the material is actually published, report it to the platform so that it is taken down, and tell the police. Intimate images of you count as personal information, so you can also contact the Information Regulator, which handles complaints under the Protection of Personal Information Act (POPIA).

Should I delete my social media? You do not need to delete it, but you should lock it down: private profile, hidden friends list and a check of followers you do not know. Deleting the profile where they contacted you can destroy evidence: screenshots first, then block.

I am under 18 (or my child is). Does anything change? Yes: tell a trusted adult straight away and open a case as soon as possible. When a child is involved, the crimes go well beyond extortion, and the police need to know at once.

In short

Faced with sextortion, the order is: do not pay, keep evidence, block, lock down your accounts, warn the people close to you and open a case. The blackmailer sells fear in bulk and collects from whoever is left alone with it; every step on this list takes away one of their levers. If you have received one of these messages, report it in the NoCall spam numbers directory: your warning could be what stops the next person from paying.