Romance scams: when love on WhatsApp ends with a request for money

Romance scams: when love on WhatsApp ends with a request for money

It starts with a friendly message on a dating app, on Facebook or Instagram, or even a "wrong number" text on WhatsApp. The person is attentive, attractive and successful: an engineer working offshore, a doctor with an international organisation, a businesswoman in Hong Kong. Within weeks they talk about love and a future together. But you never manage to meet, video calls always fail, and eventually money enters the conversation. This is a romance scam, sometimes called a love scam, and it combines emotional manipulation with financial theft. The rule: someone you have never met in person who asks you for money, or invites you to invest, is a red flag, however strong the feelings.

How does a romance scam work?

1. The approach. A stranger contacts you, often with stolen photos, and moves the chat quickly to WhatsApp, Telegram or LINE.
2. The bond. Constant messages, attention, good-morning texts, shared dreams. They learn about your life, your loneliness and your finances.
3. The obstacles. They cannot meet or video call: they are working overseas, on a ship, in a military posting, or their camera is broken.
4. The request. An emergency (hospital bills, customs fees for a gift parcel, a frozen bank account, legal trouble), a flight ticket to come and see you, or an investment they want to "share" with you on a trading platform.
5. The escalation. Each payment leads to a new problem. Some victims are asked to receive and forward money, unknowingly acting as money mules.

The investment version, where the online partner introduces you to a crypto or forex platform, is especially costly because the "profits" on screen encourage you to keep depositing.

What signs give a romance scammer away?

• Very fast declarations of love and talk of marriage.
• Excuses never to meet or to video call, or video calls that are very short, dark or blurry.
• A profile that seems too perfect; a reverse image search may show the photos belong to someone else.
• A story that involves being overseas and having money problems despite a successful career.
• Requests for money, gift cards, crypto, or for you to pay fees for a parcel or "release" of funds.
• Invitations to invest on a platform they recommend.
• Requests for secrecy: "don't tell your friends, they won't understand".
• Asking you to receive money and pass it on.

What do I do if I suspect it's a scam?

1. Do not send any more money, whatever the story.
2. Talk to someone you trust, a friend or family member. An outside view helps break the emotional hold.
3. Do a reverse image search of their profile photos.
4. Ask for a live video call with something specific (holding a sign with today's date). A scammer will find an excuse.
5. Check any investment platform against the MAS Investor Alert List and the MAS register of licensed firms.
6. If you are unsure, call the ScamShield Helpline on 1799.

What if I've already sent money?

You are not foolish: romance scammers are professionals who invest months to build trust. Act now:

1. Stop all payments and do not respond to new requests or threats.
2. Call your bank on the official number and report the transfers as a scam. Ask whether anything can be stopped or recovered.
3. Keep everything: chats, photos, profile names, bank details, crypto wallet addresses and receipts. Screenshot before blocking.
4. Make a police report through SPF e-services or at a Neighbourhood Police Centre, and follow ScamShield's I've been scammed checklist.
5. If you received money from them and passed it on, tell the police: it may be proceeds of crime, and reporting early protects you.
6. Beware of "recovery" offers. Anyone who promises to get your money back for a fee is running a second scam.

Where do I report it?

Make a police report, report the profile to the dating app or social network, report the number through ScamShield, and add it to the spam numbers directory.

Frequently asked questions

We talk every day and they seem genuine. Can it still be a scam? Yes. Daily contact is part of the method, and many scammers work from scripts in teams.

They threatened to share our private photos if I stop paying. What do I do? That is sextortion. Do not pay, keep the evidence, block, and report it to the police.

They want to visit but need money for the flight. Should I help? No. A real visitor pays for their own ticket. This is one of the most common final requests.

I feel ashamed. Should I still report it? Yes. Many people are affected, and reporting helps the police and protects others.

In short

Fast love, no meetings, a sad story and a request for money or an investment: that is a romance scam. Stop paying, tell someone you trust, keep the evidence, call your bank and make a police report. And report the number in the NoCall spam numbers directory.