Sextortion: blackmail by phone or WhatsApp and what to do

Sextortion: blackmail by phone or WhatsApp and what to do

The message arrives on WhatsApp, by SMS or in a call: someone claims to have intimate photos or videos of you and threatens to send them to your family, your workplace or your contacts unless you pay. The panic is immediate, and that is exactly what they are counting on. This is called sextortion, it is a crime, and there is a clear way to deal with it. The first thing to know: paying almost never makes it stop, and not paying almost never ends with the material being shared.

How does sextortion work?

There are two variants, and it is worth telling them apart because the fear they create is different:

• Mass, indiscriminate sextortion. Messages sent to thousands of numbers at once, often quoting an old password of yours (taken from a data breach) to sound credible: "I know your password, I have access to your camera, I recorded what you were doing." In the vast majority of cases they have nothing: it is an automated bluff that works because, out of thousands of messages, someone gets scared and pays.
• Targeted sextortion. It starts with real contact: someone messages you on social media or a dating app, earns your trust, you exchange intimate content (or they record you on a video call without your knowledge), and then the blackmail begins. Here there may be real material, and the blackmailer often sends screenshots of your contact list to increase the pressure.

In both cases the script is the same: urgency ("you have 24 hours"), secrecy ("don't tell anyone, it will only make things worse") and a payment that is hard to trace or reverse (a bank or PayNow transfer to a stranger's account, cryptocurrency, gift cards). Each of these three elements is a red flag.

Why shouldn't I pay?

For three reasons that are proven time and again:

1. Paying does not buy silence; it buys a second demand. Paying shows the blackmailer two things: that fear works on you and that you have money. The next demand usually arrives within days.
2. The material, if it exists, has already been copied. Nothing you pay guarantees that it will be deleted. There is no possible "deal" with an anonymous criminal.
3. Giving in makes you a permanent target. Your details (your number, your profile, the fact that you pay) are sold and reused in other campaigns.

And contrary to what fear tells you: in mass cases there is nothing to share, and in targeted cases actual sharing is far rarer than the threats suggest, because sharing earns them nothing and exposes them. The blackmailer's business is your fear, not your shame.

What do I do, step by step?

1. Do not pay anything. Not a single dollar, not even "to buy time". End the negotiation: do not discuss the amount or ask for more proof.
2. Do not delete anything yet. Take screenshots of the messages, numbers, profiles, threats and any payment details they have given you. They are evidence. Back everything up.
3. Cut contact without warning. Block the number and the profile. Do not announce that you are going to the police: a report is filed, not negotiated.
4. Secure your accounts. Change your passwords (start with your email), turn on two-factor authentication everywhere and review your social media privacy: friends list hidden, profile private, strangers removed from your contacts.
5. Tell the people close to you, however hard it is. A short message to your family or partner ("someone is trying to blackmail me with fake material, ignore anything you receive") disarms their most powerful threat: surprise.
6. Make a police report. File it online through SPF e-services or at a Neighbourhood Police Centre, with all your screenshots. If you feel you are in danger, call 999. If you are a minor, or the case involves a minor, say so clearly in the report. If you are not sure whether a message is a scam, the ScamShield Helpline (1799) is available 24/7.
7. Report the number in the spam numbers directory so that others recognise the campaign.

If the blackmail followed an online relationship or romance in which the other person asked you for money with a different excuse, it may overlap with a romance scam; the verification protocol is the same: cut contact, verify through an independent channel and report it.

What if I have already paid?

Do not blame yourself: you acted under threat. But change your strategy now:

• Do not pay any more, even if they promise it is "the last time". It is not.
• Keep the payment receipts: they leave a trail that helps the investigation.
• Report it anyway, explaining that you have already paid. Having paid does not make you any less of a victim or weaken your report.
• If you paid by card or bank transfer, tell your bank immediately. ScamShield's I've been scammed page sets out the next steps: contact your bank, make a police report, secure your accounts and report the scam to the platforms involved.

Frequently asked questions

They say they have a video of me, but I have never been on a video call with a stranger. Could it be true? Almost certainly not. It is the mass bluff: they send the same message to thousands of numbers, hoping someone has something to fear. If there is no possible source for that material, it does not exist.

What if the material is real? The protocol does not change: do not pay, keep the evidence, block, warn the people close to you and report it. Shame is their tool; every person you have warned is one tool fewer.

Should I delete my social media accounts? You do not need to delete them, but you should lock them down: private profile, hidden friends list and a review of followers you do not know. Deleting the profile where they contacted you can destroy evidence: screenshots first, then blocking.

I am a minor (or my child is). Does anything change? Yes: tell a trusted adult straight away and report it to the police as soon as possible. When a minor is involved the case is even more serious, so do not try to handle it alone. Keep screenshots of the messages and the profile, but do not save, forward or share any intimate image.

In short

Faced with sextortion, the order is: do not pay, keep the evidence, block, secure your accounts, warn the people close to you and report it to the police. The blackmailer sells fear wholesale and collects from whoever is left alone with it; every step on this list takes away one of their levers. If you have received one of these messages, report it in the NoCall spam numbers directory: your warning could be what stops the next person from paying.