Sextortion: blackmail by phone, text or WhatsApp and what to do

Sextortion: blackmail by phone, text or WhatsApp and what to do

The message arrives on WhatsApp, by text or in a call: someone claims to have intimate photos or videos of you and threatens to send them to your family, your workplace or your contacts unless you pay. The panic is instant, and that's exactly what they're counting on. This is sextortion, it's a crime, and there's a clear way to deal with it. The first thing to know: paying almost never makes it stop, and not paying almost never ends with the material being shared.

How does sextortion work?

There are two versions, and it's worth telling them apart because the fear they create is different:

• Mass, random sextortion. Messages sent to thousands of numbers at once, often quoting an old password of yours (taken from a data breach) to sound credible: "I know your password, I've got access to your camera, I recorded what you were doing." In the vast majority of cases they have nothing: it's an automated bluff that works because, out of thousands of messages, someone gets scared and pays.
• Targeted sextortion. It starts with real contact: someone messages you on social media or a dating app, earns your trust, you swap intimate content (or they record you on a video call without you knowing), and then the blackmail starts. Here there may well be real material, and the blackmail often includes screenshots of your contact list to pile on the pressure.

In both cases the script is the same: urgency ("you have 24 hours"), secrecy ("don't tell anyone or it'll be worse") and a payment that's hard to trace (bank transfer, cryptocurrency, gift cards). Each of those three is a red flag.

Why shouldn't I pay?

For three reasons that hold up time and again:

1. Paying doesn't buy silence, it buys a second demand. Paying proves two things to the blackmailer: that fear works on you, and that you have money. The next demand usually arrives within days.
2. The material, if it exists, has already been copied. Nothing you pay guarantees it gets deleted. There's no possible "deal" with an anonymous criminal.
3. Giving in makes you a permanent target. Your details (number, profile, the fact that you paid) get sold and reused in other campaigns.

And contrary to what fear tells you: in mass campaigns there's nothing to share, and in targeted cases actually sharing the material is far rarer than the threats suggest, because sharing it earns them nothing and exposes them. The blackmailer's business is your fear, not your shame.

What do I do, step by step?

1. Don't pay anything. Not a dollar, not even "to buy time". End the negotiation: don't haggle over the amount or ask for more proof.
2. Don't delete anything yet. Screenshot the messages, the numbers, the profiles, the threats and any payment details they've given you. That's your evidence. Back it all up.
3. Cut contact without warning. Block the number and the profile. Don't announce that you're going to the police: you report it, you don't negotiate it.
4. Lock down your accounts. Change your passwords (starting with your email), turn on two-step verification everywhere and tighten your social media privacy: hide your friends or followers list, make your profile private and remove strangers from your contacts.
5. Tell the people close to you, however hard it is. A short message to family or your partner ("someone's trying to blackmail me with fake material, ignore anything you receive") defuses their most powerful weapon: surprise.
6. Report it. Contact your state or territory police (000 if you're in immediate danger; otherwise the Police Assistance Line, 131 444, in most states) and report it online through ReportCyber, which you can reach from the AFP's cybercrime page. Have all your screenshots ready. Sextortion is extortion, and police deal with these cases regularly. If you're under 18, or the person being targeted is, report it to the Australian Centre to Counter Child Exploitation (ACCCE), which is led by the AFP, and say so clearly: it's treated as a priority. Adults can also get help from the eSafety Commissioner.
7. Report the number in the spam numbers directory so others recognise the campaign.

If the blackmail came after a supposed relationship or online romance in which the other person also asked you for money with other excuses, it may overlap with a romance scam; the approach is the same: cut contact, check through an independent channel and report it.

What if I've already paid?

Don't blame yourself: you acted under threat. But change tack now:

• Don't pay any more, even if they promise it's "the last time". It isn't.
• Keep the payment receipts: they're a trail that helps the investigation.
• Report it anyway, and explain that you've already paid. Having paid doesn't make you any less of a victim or weaken your report.
• If you paid by card or bank transfer, tell your bank straight away: sometimes the money can be recovered. You'll find more on what to do after a scam on our blog.
• If the blackmailer also got into your accounts or got hold of your identity documents, IDCARE (1800 595 160) offers free support.

Frequently asked questions

They say they have a video of me, but I've never been on a video call with a stranger. Could it be true? Almost certainly not. It's the mass bluff: they send the same message to thousands of numbers, hoping someone has something to fear. If there's no possible source for that material, it doesn't exist.

What if the material is real? The plan doesn't change: don't pay, keep the evidence, block, warn the people close to you and report it. Shame is their tool; every person you've warned is one less tool for them.

Should I delete my social media? You don't need to delete it, but you should lock it down: private profile, hidden friends list and a review of followers you don't know. Deleting the profile where they contacted you can destroy evidence: screenshots first, then block.

I'm under 18 (or my child is). Does anything change? Yes: tell a trusted adult straight away and report it as soon as possible, to the ACCCE or the police. When a minor is involved, it's treated as online child sexual exploitation, not just extortion, and the investigation is a priority. Don't pay, don't delete the chat before it's been reported, and never forward or share any intimate images.

In short

When it comes to sextortion, the order is: don't pay, keep the evidence, block, lock down your accounts, warn your circle and report it. The blackmailer sells fear wholesale and collects from whoever is left alone with it; every step on this list takes away one of their levers. If you've received one of these messages, report it in the NoCall spam numbers directory: your warning could be what stops the next person from paying.